Personal Mission Statement

<br />
I will appreciate those who love me, continue to help those who need me, forgive those who hurt me and be mindful of those who left me. <br />
I will remember what made me who I am and continue to rise. <br />
I will use my beliefs and values to guide me,<br />
I will start a medical revolution, <br />
To anyone who stands in my way, I shall pray, remove your right kidney and CRTL ATL DELETE DELETE DELETE. <br />

Lol. That was my mission statement I wrote the beginning of senior year of college. I have issues. Lol. But it does mean a lot to me. <br />
I have been working lots of overtime. So the blog has been neglected a bit because I don't like doing it from my phone but I will be updating myself on your blogs very shortly!! <br />

Meanwhile here is a piece I completed last week. I got the inspiration from an old friend on instagram. She has beautiful features so I incorporated them. Hope ya like! <br />
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I had to Check Myself.

I have been going through a lot lately. I just can't really seem to get my life together. For starts studying for the MCAT and having a full time job and one part time job, while looking for a new job is definitely taking it's course. My lab job ends September 1st and because they are downsizing I can't get a full time position. Its blows. My love life is definitely on the rocks. Major iceberg rocks. Its weird how one person can come in and make you change your entire life plan (Don't worry I still want to be Dr. Green). I found the one I want to marry. Hell I think I am ready to be married. But is life ready for me to be married?

Anyhow. I thought I should take time out to focus know the things I should be grateful for while I feel my life is in shambles. Because its really not that bad.

I am grateful:

1. That I can wake up every day and just breathe. There are a lot who are on life support and can't do it on their own.

2. that I have family who is always there for me no matter what. There are those who have never known what family means, blood or not.

3. That I was raised to be independent and strong. Many do not have the backbone or courage to go after what they want.

4. I can put food in my refrigerator and have the option to throw away leftovers. Many don't even have the option of eating at all and here I am throwing stuff away.

5. That the person whom I have come to call my best friend, come to love and adore will still come to my rescue even at my most stubborn times. I am going to marry him. Lol 

6. Grateful I have a great education. I know too many people who didn't make it out of high school and still can't read.

7. Grateful to be able to physically and mentally take care of myself. Many people have no clue what that even entails.

8. Grateful to have amazing friends!! I know that even though we don't talk every single day, when we get together it goes down!!!! Many people have too many enemies to ever know a friend.

9. Grateful to have options. Far too many have none.

10. Grateful to have this blog. I can speak my mind whether people read it or not. In many places people dk not have that option. They are killed for having something to say.

What are you grateful for?

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playing with bacon.

These are a few sketches I worked on this week that I thought Id share with you guys. Its been a very long time since I have sketched anything. I usually get in a drawing mood when I am going through things. Its weird. Im sorry for the previous semi depressing blog. I felt the need to write a poem. Ya girl is going THROUGH IT. haha.

The first sketch I call "Despair" actually is my favorite right now. It just explains a lot as far as frustration and anguish. The second I never came up with a name for.

I don't really want to go into detail about exactly what's going on because its more personal than Id like it to be. But lets just put it this way. Love has been lost. Lol. Not dead. Just lost. Its weird spending your every waking moment you're not working or schooling making bacon. Then one day bacon is completely omitted from the world.... Crap. No bacon. What the neck do I do now?!? I don't want to cook turkey!!!

Excuse my retarded analogy. Makes no sense I know. I promise to bring happier blogs.

Hope ya like the sketches!

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Heart Broken.

Unspoken raindrops cloud the cotton pillow case.

Lines of mascara all trying to win a race.

Late nights, early mornings developed by empty cause,

Holes in the engine shatter circuit boards.

Unlevied by the tension, heighten by suspension,
Unspoken rain drops cloud the cotton pillow case.

How do you, why do you, why should you?
Come on stop it.

Oh no,
I think the mascara won,
Eyes burn like they've been blazed by the sun.

Why can't you tell me.
Oh well. The shits done.

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No children=Better life??

What does it mean to be a successful? Does it mean marriage, awesome career and kids? Can you still be considered truly successful if your blood line stops at you? The reason I ask this is because I just read an article on "Why childfree couples have it all."

The article says that we "are taught to have children and that it the ultimate path to parenthood and fulfilment in life is nothing but an assumption. She continues to to blab on in the middle and chooses to end the article with couple who  have no children have it all because "they have the time to devote and space to their relationship." that because they have no children can value each others career and personal goals better.

I am not sure how I feel about this. Granted I do not want children anytime soon but eventually. This does not mean that I won't have a great marriage and career however.

What do you think? Are childfree couples the ones who have it all? 

Check out the story on huffingtonpost.com

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Solitary Confinement...NOT.

Life over the last week has been well... busy. Yet interesting. This whole coming into yourself and knowing who you truly are can get a bit lonely. I mean..really. I just kept finding ways to keep myself busy. So two great things happened to me while I was on this little me venture. I got to spend time with some of my family. We went to the Baltimore Aquarium and saw too many animals and ate a lot.

Then another great surprise happened to me this week. As many of you may or may not know I am originally from San Diego, California. I moved to this "city" my senior year of HS and have been here ever since. One of my longest childhood friends took a road trip to jersey and came down to see me. I missed her so! Its been 7 long years!!!

Because she is just as weird as I like to pretend I am not. lol =)

Until the next we link up! 

Learning to fly solo

There comes a point in life when you realize you have never been alone. At least I haven't..well in all fairness i have always been extremely so I never really had time to think about being alone really. Now with no papers, exams tomorrow, or reason to really be busy other than clean my apartment... I have friends.. But they have lives too. I feel like I need to know what its like to be completely alone. Not fixing  someone. Not trying to help someone else be better.

My goal over the next few months is to figure out exactly who I am, exactly what I believe, what I need. I know what I want. In a heart beat. But what do I truly need?? Only time will tell..

“Find out who you are and do it on purpose.”
― Dolly Parton